Life is a Dream

When I first came to social media we were living in the hospital while my son was being treated for brain cancer. In the ensuing crisis of faith, which is putting it mildly, I expressed myself freely, as I am inclined to do, and people - many of whom I didn't even know - reprimanded me, saying, "Don't disparage prayer. We prayed for your son and he survived cancer." (Which has nothing to do with "God" - or prayer - and everything to do with them) To which I replied, "People prayed for the little girl in the room next to ours and she died. What's your point?" It was as though my opinion about "God" or prayer was a cancer to their beliefs, and the "cure" was to tell me I shouldn't express it, which seemed as absurd to me then as it does now.
But that's what beliefs are: An extension of our fears, a bridge to the things that terrify us most, a wall separating us from the possibility of real faith and spirituality and knowledge in this life which is only a dream anyway. How do I know that? Here I am expressing my belief about beliefs. If I wasn't afraid of something I wouldn't need to do this. Hopefully someday I'll dream that I am fearless, wake up, and stop.

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